Knowing all the answers

 

Erik Gray's journals

#journalgems

written by Erik February 3, 2017

I don't know all the answers. And I guess I don't have to. 

I know enough to know that God is real. Jesus Christ is real. 

And the Atonement is real. 

And the questions I don't know aren't important enough to doubt or struggle or anything... in fine waiting and just seeing what happens.

I know ENOUGH. 

Enough to know that this is all real.

Erik and friends

SEVEN YEARS.... ahhhh. Love and miss you Erik. You're in a good place. We'll all be in that good place sometime....until then... we'll keep plugging along. Love mom

Gray family 2024

Nieces and Nephews 2024, minus the babies Jonah and Britton

My Favorite Scripture

 

#JournalGems
BIO of Erik he wrote for himself (FOR A VIDEO)
Written by Erik Fall 2016

My name is Erik Gray.

Two weeks before I turned 16, I was diagnosed with stage IV salivary gland cancer. The cancer was mainly in the layers of skin in my neck. Over the next six years, I battled cancer off and on. It returned about 3 or so times, I lose track. At one point, it spread to my jaw bone, and we removed my fibula to replace that part of my jaw.
I've underwent 11 surgeries (including biopsies), 3 rounds of radiation, and I'm currently on my third round of chemo.

At the age of 22, I've been through a lot. Its been the biggest trial of my life. I've had to give some things up. I took a semester off, twice, and had to leave my favorite job at an ice cream store. I served a year-long mission-- in which I had to put it on pause while I spent six months on chemo.

However, if it weren't for having cancer, I never would've chosen my current major. I never would have transferred universities and met so many amazing people.

I don't wish cancer upon ANYONE! I do wish people could see life the way I see it, because having cancer has taught me so many things: Life is SO good.
Happiness is a choice.
God. Is. Real.

Sometimes it's easy to think "Why was I given this trial?" But I've learned that I should be grateful... which may not make sense: I'm grateful that God loves me enough to give me these trials. I'm grateful that He wants to test me... to see how I can learn and grow from this. Hopefully to one day, become just like him.

Heavenly Father loves us so much. He cares about everything we will ever go through. His son, our brother, Jesus Christ performed the Atonement so that we never have to feel anything alone. He will help us and lift us up when we need it. My favorite scripture is Isaiah 40:31... "But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint." However detrimental my trials may be, God is there. And one day I'll get to look into my Savior's eyes and say, "Thank you... I couldn't have done it without you." And that is what keeps me going.

I'm grateful

 

Erik Gray's journals
#journalgems

Written by Erik, December 2016

Sometimes it's easy to think "Why was I given this trial?" But I've learned that I should be grateful... which may not make sense: I'm grateful that God loves me enough to give me these trials. I'm grateful that He wants to test me... to see how I can learn and grow from this. Hopefully to one day become just like him.

Heavenly Father loves us so much. He cares about everything we will ever go through. His son, our brother, Jesus Christ performed the Atonement so that we never have to feel anything alone. He will help us and lift us up when we need it. 

My favorite scripture is Isaiah 40:31... "But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint." 

However detrimental my trials may be, God is there. And one day I'll get to look into my Savior's eyes and say, "Thank you... I couldn't have done it without you." And that is what keeps me going. 

As quick as the snap of a finger

Erik Gray's journals

#journalgems

written July 17, 2015

    Remember how yesterday (in my journal) I wrote about feeling un-forgiven - why would I feel good and forgiven, and then suddenly not feel good about things I've repented of with the Lord?  Well, it still bugged me tonight.  I searched and tried to read and find something that would answer that question.  BUT then I prayed.  I asked,  "Heavenly Father, why would I feel bad about a past situation I've taken care of with thee?"  

    And the thought came to me that I am tired.  I have tended to be a lot harder on myself when I'm tired, especially Saturdays, the end of the week.  The thought that I'm just so exhausted and the conversation with a good friend brought up old feelings and because I am tired, I couldn't shake it.  Sounds like the most interesting explanation of it. But the immediate change from uneasiness to peace - GREAT PEACE - as quick as the snap of a finger... I knew that without a doubt, this answer was from God.  How grateful I am that He listens and answers.  I love prayer and that I am connected to Heavenly Father.  I think that it deals with fear...why am I so afraid of the person I was and the mistakes I made?  The past is just that, the past.

   

pc:  Erik G - Fall 2016 - Bryce Canyon

It's in the past

Erik Gray's Journals
#journalgems
Tuesday, August 19th, 2014
Temple Service Mission

P-day! I got all my laundry done, my room clean (for the most part), and even helped watch Camden and Easton this morning. Talk about a busy day. I know that I'm not ready for kids right now. It's too exhausting. 

I listened to a podcast today, where William Joseph was interviewed.  He is a really amazing piano player.  In part of the interview he talked about being offered the chance to write a music score for part of a show.  It didn't name what the show was.  He watched one of the aired episodes and saw that it was not a good show at all.  He declined the offer.  

That only made me think of the fact that I've watched 'How I Met Your Mother'.  It's funny, but it is so bad.  I love the story line. I constantly bragged about it.  I shouldn't have.  I shouldn't have been so public about a show that is so against my morals.  If I was perfect, I would have never watched that entire series anyway.  But am I perfect? No. No one on this earth is, except Christ.  thankfully, the atonement is really real. I can repent and make up for my sins. Including allowing an environment to stay where spirit is not welcome.  It's in the past.  The only thing I can do is move forward, from any sin.  How great is this gospel?!